Thursday, March 22, 2007

Question de flux

Il y a deux manières de décrire les causes de l'amitié de circonstance. Je ne parle pas des amitiés désintéressées basées sur la complicité intellectuelle ou spirituelle, mais ces amitiés que vous semblez nouer, a priori, rien que pour en avoir, et qui restent nécessaires à la survie de cette espèce sociale que vous êtes.

Tout d'abord, il est que la relation d'amitié émerge souvent d'inégalités où, selon le principe des vases communiquants (mmh, pas vraiment), les sujets s'y engagent pour raccoler leurs propres manques et ceux des autres. Dans le cas spécifique (mais non spécial) d'une société superficielle comme la nôtre, cette inégalité entre deux sujets est généralement liée à l'information et la peste. Suivez.

For the sake of caricature, examinons l'hypothèse d'une amitié entre les lettres "M" et "Z"* (comme Mazen et Ziad, prénoms uni-confessionnels fétiches des médiocres télé-séries libanaises // au féminin on dira Maryam et Zeina). Les "autres" (l'environnement social, familial ou voisinal) seront représentés par les lettres "LA PESTE".

Situation 1: M < Z.
Aussi bien symbolisée par Z > M, cette situation se résume comme suit: M se régale de rumeurs croustillantes et autres potins délicieux concernant LA PESTE grâce à Zei-"les murs ont de oreilles"-na. Pour rester au courant de tout ce qui passe et s'immuniser contre les mauvaises langues et les noires intentions (LA PESTE quoi), il faut bien être au courant de l'actualité sociale avant qu'elle n'arrive. Patati après patata, à raison de quelques heures par semaine de mise à jour, LA PESTE n'a qu'à bien se tenir parce que, grâce à Z, Maryam sait tout sur tout le monde. Pour M, cette relation est nécessaire voire existentielle.

Situation 2: M > Z.
Ici, le flux d'information est inversé (Z < M). Mazen déballe toutes ses merdes et tous ses sales secrets à l'écouteur Z. Quand même ce transfert cathartique de data n'a lieu qu'occasionnellement ou même rarement, la valeur de l'information (projetée sur le référentiel de LA PESTE) impose cependant une approche prudente de la part de M qui doit en garantir le secret. Bref, M fait mieux de maintenir Z-"he knows too much" en ami plutôt que de l'avoir comme ennemi et faire face à un déballage de langue vindicatif. Encore, existentiel.

En deux mots; en plein dans l'ère de l'information, le manque et le surplus peuvent s'avérer décisifs quant à la création et/ou le maintien de vos amitiés. La clé: contrôlez vos flux.


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* Les lecteurs préalablement lavés par la bêtise de L'Orient-LeJour y verront les initiales du propagandiste (sinon analphabète) Ziad Makhoul, une sorte de mokho fadé habillé en journaliste qui n'écrit pas plus loin que la Syrie. Chers amis, ceci n'est que pure coïncidence.

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7 réactions:

Anonymous The dude...

Phil dude, less than usual...
ma tefhamne ghalat, its still funny.
Pero puedes hacer mejor
Et voila 4 (et non trois kama za3amta sabikan!)

Actually, that's 5 if you count the arabic v/s lebanese.... :P

March 22, 2007 8:43 AM

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Anonymous Anonymous...

i can't help but feel that we had a similar conversation once. but then again the voice in my head kinda sounds like you!
i see your background in communication creates a veil to a much deeply rooted social problem. you brushed the issue of necessary friendship, or circumstantial as you call it.
next blog let's expand the notion to incorporate other issues such as:
all the different complexes (inferiority, suppperority, bestiality, etc...); the conundrum of wants vs. needs (people don't want a friend, they need a friend! i mean seriously dude how many people want a friend, i.e. an independently controlled entity! nobody! we want somebody just like us, to do what we want, when we want, how we want, and with whomever we want! think bush and blair as opposed to bush and the rest of the world. we don't want friends with their own opinion and shit... that's the annoying kind!); the identification factor (friends are like haircuts: you could potentially change them ad hoc when you're young, hip and cool but the older you get the more you identify with that one haircut. if for nothing else, you don't feel like trying a new barber); the socialization factor (to morph into a socially acceptable beast and to escape the vile state that makes us autonomous beings with free thought and will (we don't like those people), people have to connect with others of better of less value than them. i mean who wants to be a feral child! certainly not you! (this is my attempt to use fear-mongering as a selling tool for the upside of friendships… i need feedback to see if it works, it was highly recommended by those that share my cubicle); and finally the most important reason people have friends is to suppress the mere thought of being alone even for a minute and/or also stop the voices in their head from becoming their best friends. self-actualization and the thought of genuine, no strings attached, friendships is so scary that they would connect with the first mother fucker that comes along!
besides that keep writing, i enjoy it… nay, i enjoy you!

PS: if i am mazen can you be my ziad? please...

March 22, 2007 8:28 PM

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Blogger Mon Liban...

Bonne conclusion... c'est le genre de situation fréquente en plus!

Et heureusement que le dernier paragraphe est là sinon j'aurais sorti toute sorte de rumeur sur les initiales choisies :p

March 22, 2007 11:28 PM

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Blogger phil...

the (penta-lingue) dude > I agree Jeano set the bar too high.


(not so) Anonymous >>

I like. As the voice in your head, I will attempt to draw on paper my /personal/ reactions to your thoughts. (People reading and trying to imagine the scene, please note that as "the voice" I tend to be deep and raw with a hint of chill -- somehow like Satan's voice in South Park but a bit more mysterious and a bit less naïve, or like the elf Hero in Warcraft only a bit less agressive).

On all the complexes. I guess it is the most common factor. (Spirou et Fantasio, Tintin et Milou).

On the conundrum of wants vs. needs, I agree that it is usually the pickle. I want a double. I need a pet. Does that mean I am a pet? Then how could I own a pet myself?

On the id factor. I will not claim to have experienced it, given that I am still young, hip and cool.

On the the socialization factor and the fear of being completely autonomous. Personally, I would say that it weighs with the reasons why I tend to dislike socializing. Of course one's mind is conditioned by what it absorbs, so I say fukc absorption through socializing. I'd rather socialize with Baudrillard. And I do not agree with the idea that persons can be "evaluated" in the absolute sense. I do not think I have a better or less value than the voice in anyone else's head. So, no, your selling tool did not work (and since it didn't work on the voice in your head, that means it does not even convince you -- scratch that, I know you(s) better).

On the last point. I fail to see why you would want to stop the voice in your head from becoming your best friend.

OK I will go to bed now. It's late and I have a job interview tomorrow. I had to put on some Paul Van Dyk to get me through this comment. abba


mon liban > des rumeurs? comme quoi?

March 23, 2007 12:21 AM

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Anonymous Anonymous...

the humanist in you sees people with no intrinsic value besides sheer humanity but the social context we all live in does, without a doubt, attach a value to people and therefore an added value from their perceived friendship. value is not from evaluation (objextive in essence) but from perception (subjective).
can we pretend that i'm still anonymous?

March 23, 2007 12:35 AM

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Blogger Mon Liban...

Des rumeurs telles que l'hypnotisation réussie de Ziad Makhoul sur toi par exemple!! :p

March 25, 2007 12:58 AM

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Blogger phil...

tutankh-anon > yes. you will stay anon.

mon liban > merde!

April 10, 2007 10:29 PM

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